The Quest Begins

This is what they don’t tell you when you really want to publish a book: Finding a literary agent is HARD.

Have you looked at some of these websites? They’re a jumble of people all wanting something different from you. Many don’t even want you to email your query letter. Are you kidding? You don’t want me to EMAIL?! The fuck is this? 1989?

You would think these agents would actually like to make life a little easier by not having to deal with all that paper and whatnot. Christ.

Not only that, but apparently I’m working in a paradox of genres. A sci-fi themed gay love story just doesn’t fit the mold for any agent. Granted, it’s not so heavy on the sci-fi bit.

Oh hell. What have I gotten myself into?

So here is the option I see: canvas the shit out of every agent who just works in gay fiction. Spam the hell out of them and hope some genuine interest is drummed up.

Look, I know my story isn’t a great work of literature. Its mediocre at best and I’m well aware that I can do much better with a story I’ve really thought about. But I know there’s a place in this world for my dear, dear novel. I mean, c’mon, did any of the rest of you see that book about gay vampires on the quest for tantric sex? I did. I wish I could forget it.

What really worries me is that because of its mediocre nature and lack of steamy gay sex, no gay will go near it. Let’s not kid ourselves, men. We’re only interested in the fucking.

Well I’m not, dammit! I want a gay story that doesn’t center on the protagonists finally getting their fag on. I want two guys who love each other to find themselves thrown into the figurative fire. Adventure calls and together they brave the world before them. And by god, that’s what I did. And I’ve got so many ideas for them now.

WON’T SOMEONE LET MY CHARACTERS HAVE THEIR ADVENTURE??!!

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